Wild and Witty

Another Day.  Another City.  Another campground.  Three nights ago, we camped in Deadwood, SD after spending the day in Mt. Rushmore.  I spent the last two nights at a campground in Cody, Wyoming.  We did not travel at all yesterday; it was a nice break.  Not a planned break, but a nice one (I’ll tell you more about that in a minute.)  Today we traveled through Montana, and we are stopped in Missoula for the night. 

So how do I describe the scenery?  In a word-breathtaking.  Crystal has to keep reminding me to keep my eyes on the road.  Each mountain range is so unique.  Some are nothing but cliffs of rock.  Others are like rolling grassy hills.  In the distance, you can see snow capped mountains.  The evergreen covered mountains are my favorite.  The Black Hills near Rushmore are blanketed by them.  The sky is huge.  You can see a storm rolling in from miles away.  And at night, the stars dance.  And the rivers are white, as the currents pass over huge rocks and boulders.  As we ascend a mountain, driving over hills and around curves, you can look out and see beautiful valleys. 

 Two days ago, while driving to Cody, we passed over the Big Horn mountains.  Out of everything I’ve seen thus far, that has been the pinnacle.  The beauty of those mountains-wow.  Our God is an artist, and this world is His canvas.  He is so creative, so wild!  Have you ever thought of God that way-creative and wild?  Look around you.  Watch a stallion run, or gaze at a fire as it dances, or drive on a road carved out on the side of a rugged mountain.  And then realize that it was all His idea.

Anyway, I had begun my descent, all 18 miles of it, and I was enjoying every moment, drinking in the beauty of it all…until I realized that my trailer brakes had stopped working.  Not good. I am descending a steep, extremely curvy mountain, with no trailer brakes, and my Tahoe brakes were feeling spongy under my feet.  So I pulled over onto a scenic overlook, and my father-in-law pulled in behind me  When I got out of my vehicle, I noticed that the rear brakes on my Tahoe were smoking.  Without going into too much detail, about three hours later, while our families sat at a roadside diner called Dirty Annie’s, Crystal’s dad and I slooooooowly drove my Tahoe down the mountain.  By the time we were ready to move my vehicle, the brakes had cooled down and we had no problems getting it to the bottom.  Still, it is just a little unnerving rounding sharp curves with less than reliable brakes and only a guard rail separating you from the edge of the cliff. We spent the next day fixing my trailer brakes at a campground in Cody.  But I learned a valuable lesson: when you are descending a steep mountain and the sign says “Use Lower Gear,” third gear is not low enough.

Well, we are only about 150 miles from Coeur d’ Alene.  A roadtrip that started 15 days ago, will end tomorrow, but the adventure is just beginning.  It is exciting and frightening all at the same time.  I mean, we really need to see God come through and so some amazing things. But it seems as though God is always reassuring me of His promises to me.  Sometimes it's through provision.  Sometimes it’s through His Word.  Sometimes it’s through the encouragement of a friend.  And sometimes, it’s through a still, small voice.  Last night, in Cody, I was feeling anxious about all that still needed to happen.  I stepped out of my tent, looked up, and gazed at the stars in the vast night sky.  And the Artist who spoke them into being asked, “And you’re still wondering if I can take care of you?”  Noy only is He wild, but He is also witty. 

Weary Traveler

It is a little past 10pm (mountain time) on Saturday evening, and I am lying in a tent at a campground in Rapid City, SD.  My kids were asleep before they hit the mat tonight.  My little adventurers are exhausted.  We have been very busy since we left Traverse City four days ago. 

Let’s see, we met up with my in-laws in Michigan’s upper peninsula.  They chose to spend their family vacation traveling with us.  So we drove all day, and found a campground for the night.  The next morning, we bathed in Lake Superior, the coldest of the Great Lakes, and we spent most of the day driving to Minnesota to another campground.  Yesterday, we spent most of the day at Mall of America.  My three oldest all rode their first roller coasters.  And I pretty much decided that the “thrill” of thrill rides no longer excites me.  After we left the mall, we drove late into the night and stopped at a truck stop close to midnight.  My Tahoe is not quite as spacious as a hotel room or even my tent, but I managed to get a little rest.

Left the truck stop at 7 am this morning, headed to Rapid City.  But we took our time and stopped at few attractions. as we traveled.  We went to a place called 1880 Town.  I almost didn’t buy tickets, but so glad that I did.  It was really cool to see this town, walk into its buildings, and think about the people who left security to go west and make a life for themselves and their families.  Many of them never seeing their friends or loved ones again.  They did not know what they would face, whether sickness, bandits, poverty, or whatever.  What courage and strength they had!  We also took a scenic tour through the badlands.  Amazing!   We stopped several times along the way to take pictures, and my kids spent some time climbing the rocks.  Tomorrow, we head to Mt, Rushmore, then onward to Yellowstone. 

As I write, I feel somewhat like a weary traveler.  Don’t get me wrong.  I have greatly enjoyed this road trip with my in-laws, and this time with my wife and kids is priceless.  The beauty of this great country takes my breath away.  But I am ready to have a place to call home.  I think that is why it was so hard leaving Traverse City a few days ago.  That place was home to me.  Even when I moved back to South Carolina, TC was still home.  SC was just a part of the journey. Albeit an extremely vital part, but I knew when I arrived there that I was just passing through.  Returning to Traverse City was like going back to all the comforts, familiarities, friendships, and beauties of home.

Arriving in Coeur d’alene will be much different, I think.  I will know nobody.  I will have to find a house when we get there, and a church.  I am still not 100% sure what I am going to do for work.  I have so many questions streaming in my mind.  So the security of a place like Traverse City can be very alluring in the midst of all the uncertainty.  But I still hold to the promise that God is going to take care of us, and that is all that really drives me now.  That, and the fact that I believe this journey is part of what I am supposed to bring to the world.  I can’t really explain it, but I feel like our journey will be a catalyst for others who dare to dream big.  And so I move forward.  This quest for Eleutheria is not without its doubts and fears, no quest is.  But My King is faithful, and He will complete the work He has started in us.

While we were driving around Lake Superior, we passed by a marina filled with boats, and Crystal said something to me that totally renewed my resolve.  It was actually a quote from bestselling author, Chris Brady.  “Ships are safe in the harbor, but they are not made for the harbor.  Good sailors are not made on calm seas.”    And so we are sailing in some uncharted waters, and it is not always smooth sailing, but the Captain of my vessel is leading us.  And we will arrive at our destination, and we will be stronger for having made the journey.  And we will have some struggles, and we will have some setbacks, and we will meet new people, and we forge new friendships, and we will make this unknown territory into a home.

                                                                                                                                                           

   

The Pilgrimage

I am back where it all began.  Traverse City, MI.  We had made plans to come this way on our journey.  Yes, it added 700 miles onto our trip, but no distance would have been too far. It was kind of like a pilgrimage for us.  My family needed this.  I needed this.  And to be perfectly honest, I don’t want to leave.

There is no place on this earth as dear to me as Traverse City, MI.  It is where I first came alive.  It is where I stripped off the façade and began my journey to authenticity.  It is the first place I felt truly accepted.  It is where I experienced true community.  It is where I first learned how to know God and walk with Him.  It is where I became me.

There is a special beauty and comfort that I find here.  On Saturday evening, I was in Elk Rapids, standing on the edge of the Grand Traverse Bay.  It was about 10 pm; and the sun had just set.  Hues of pink, orange, and blue filled the sky.  A cool breeze was blowing, and I closed my eyes, lifted my face to the sky, and wondered to myself, “So why did I leave here again?”

As we reconnected with people, we were not just visiting friends; we are reuniting with family.  And the time has flown by. Two and a half days is simply not enough time.  You see, I actually expected this to be different.  I thought that we would come, catch up with a few friends, talk about old times, share some memories, and realize that as much as we love this place, it is not what it once was.  It would no longer feel like home.  But I was wrong.  I am crying as I think about having to say goodbye to this place and these precious people again.

I could easily settle down here again, except for two things.  First of all, as much as I love this place, we know the dream God has placed upon our hearts. And we know that, for now anyway, our path leads to Idaho.  We cannot lay aside God’s calling simply for the sake of comfort and security.  We must persevere, continue down the road that has been paved for us by God, trusting His heart and His promises.

Secondly, my friends would not let me stop here even if I wanted to.  I have awesome friends, and so many of them have bought in to our dream.  They have supported us, encouraged us, prayed for us, helped us, and they will not let us settle for anything less than God’s best. 

And so today, we will continue on our journey, having been strengthened by our dear friends, and reminded of the wonderful grace of God, and the mighty work that He did in us here.  And I will carry that with me forever.  And I will cry …a lot.  We all will.

No Small Thing

I am sitting at a table on the wraparound porch at my in-laws farm house.  After three days of travel, it is nice to have a “do nothing” day.  We will leave here tomorrow for Traverse City to see friends for a couple of days, and then we take a hard left that will lead us to Idaho.

It has been a great journey so far.  For those of you who were worrying, you will pleased to hear that Crystal and I made it all the way from South Carolina to Michigan without one argument.  Not even a small one.  We left on Tuesday after lunch, drove to Virginia and stopped for the night.  Wednesday, we drove to Ohio, and spent the night at a dairy farm.  Elmer and Carolyn are the parents of our good friend, Noah, in South Carolina. Noah’s wife, Emily, encouraged us to stop there on our journey, promising us that we would leave encouraged and refreshed.  How right she was!  We spent Wednesday evening, sitting around the picnic table, just talking about our great God and how He works in the lives of His people.  Then they took us to the Wooster fireworks show, that was supposed to start at 10 pm, but that actually started at 9:30 because rain was moving into the area.  So we watched the grand finale  from a distance as we were driving to the show.  But I was totally cool with that, less traffic to deal with.

The next morning, Emily’s mom, Barb, and her husband, Larry, joined us for breakfast, and we all took a tour of the farm together.  (Homeschool field trip).  Before we left, we all formed a circle, held hands, and these two special couples spent some time praying over us, our family, our journey, and our future ministry.

 You know, when someone used to say to me, “I’ll be praying for you,” I never really gave it much thought.  It was a nice sentiment and all, but those words never really impacted me.  But over the past couple of years, and especially the past few months, that one statement has become so dear to me.  Especially when I know that the person saying it actually means it.  What I like even more is when someone says, “We want to pray over you right now.”  It is so precious to me when people that I respect, admire, and love put their hands on our heads or shoulders, and ask God to pour out His provision, power, and blessing upon us. To fellowship with them around the throne of grace- WOW!  How awesome is that?  I have been encouraged and challenged by all of the prayers prayed over us regarding our quest.

We arrived at my in-law’s house at about 7:30 last night.  Actual drive time from SC to here-about twenty hours.  Without hauling a huge trailer, this would be a fourteen hour trip.  Needless to say, I am driving at a much slower pace with the trailer.  Instead of my usual 75-80 mph’s, I am driving at the astounding rate of 45-55 mph’s, with downhill gusts of 65.  I kind of feel like the tortoise from the children’s story, “Slow and steady wins the race.”  That’s’ okay, though.  I had determined before we ever drove our first mile that I was going to take it slow, and that we would arrive precisely when God means for us to.  And it has actually been rather relaxing.  I don’t have any deadlines.  I am not trying to break my speed record from the last trip.  We stop when we want to.  I have not been impatient.  My wife can tell you that that alone is a good moral victory for me. 

I know that we still have many miles to go; we are only about a quarter of the way to our destination, but our mighty Captain has been so faithful thus far.  Of course, I expected nothing different.  The trailer, which was probably my greatest concern, is traveling beautifully.  My kids are traveling even better.   Man, they are troopers; I am so proud of them.

 And here’s the really cool thing, I have not paid one penny out of my pocket.  My expenses thus far, including gas, hotel, food, and numerous coffee breaks, total about $520.  But before we left SC, we started receiving farewell cards and gifts.  $20, $100, $50, $250, $160, a $50 gas card, Starbucks gift cards.  We made it from South Carolina to Michigan without spending any of our own money.  Not only that, but God has also provided other things.  A friend gave us a hand held video recorder.  Someone paid for some work I needed to have done to my Tahoe, $386 value.  I needed a weight distribution kit for my trailer, and a friend actually had one in storage that he gave to me.  That saved me over $500.   My kids were given gifts to entertain them on the road.  I mean, so many blessings have been poured out on us. 

Believe it or not, I have a tendency to worry about the details.  How is this going to work?  How are we going to make it?  Will we have enough?  And God shows me time and time again, “Son, I have got you covered.  I am taking care of you.”  He is parting the rivers of the Jordan so that we can walk through on dry ground. 

Thanks to everyone who has favored us with a blessing from God.  Your gift to us is no small thing.  In fact, I am coming to believe that there are no such things as “small things.”  I believe that everything done in the name of the Kingdom is a big deal.  There was a boy that gave only a small lunch, but it fed thousands.  There was a young man that only had a small sling, but it brought down a giant.  There was a general that had a small army, but it delivered Israel from the Midianites.  There was a man that had a small faith, but it healed his son.  God takes our “small things” and makes them mighty.  It all counts for the glory and honor of our great King.

And So It Begins

Today, we embark on our quest. Today we step into the water.  Today, we stop talking about the journey and start living it.  And God is going to do something absolutely amazing.  He must do something amazing, because He has promised to do so.

Today I call on the God of Abraham, Moses, David, Elijah, Daniel, Peter, and Paul, and I ask You to do it again.  Do for us what you did for them.  Unleash Your power, Your wisdom, Your provision.  God, I can't make this journey if you are not holding me every mile.  Guide us, lead us, protect us.  Perform miracles on our behalf.   We trust You, we love You, and we worship You.  Thank you for being ever faithful.

And so it begins...

A Fond Farewell

“Farewell, my brave hobbits.  My work is now finished.  Here at last on the shores of the sea comes the end of our fellowship.  I will not say ‘Do not weep.’  For not all tears are an evil.”

                                                                                                                                Gandalf, Return of the King

No matter how many times I have watched The Lord of the Rings (and it has been many times), I always break down at the end.  Gandalf and Frodo say farewell to their friends and board a ship, leaving behind middle earth and their dearest companions forever.  It’s beautiful, it’s poetic, and it tears me up.  I mean, I know that it’s coming, and I try to prepare for it.  But it doesn’t matter.  Gandalf starts talking, and the tears start flowing.  Yes, I know, I need to man-up, but that three minute clip stirs something deep inside of me.

I have pondered this for some time, and I think I know why my soul weeps as Gandalf and Frodo sail away to the undying lands.  I think it is the finality of it all.  Gandalf and Frodo will never again see their hobbit friends.  And that is not the way it is supposed to be.  We were not created for “Farewell.”  God intended us to live in fellowship, in communion with Him and with one another.  It was only after the fall of man that the loneliness and emptiness of separation became a part of the human experience.  And we all long for the day where “good-bye” no longer has to leave our lips.  One day, when King Jesus makes all things right, “farewell” will be a thing of the past. 

Until then, however, we will continue to weep bitter tears, and experience the sadness of loss as we say “good-bye” to those who are dear to us.  Tomorrow morning, we set out in pursuit of a dream that was birthed several years ago.  But tonight my thoughts are on those that we must leave behind, those who hold a special place in our hearts.  Allow me to speak to each of them directly:

Mom and Dad:  I am so thankful for the time that we had together.  It passed so quickly.  We love you very much, and look forward to the time that we can all be together again.

Steve and Robin:  I remember sitting in your living room shortly after we moved here, and you shared with us all of the things God was doing in your hearts.  I am so excited to see the journey that He has taken you on as you have had the courage to listen to His voice and follow His leading.  We admire you guys so much.  God has great plans for you.  Steve, thanks for letting me work for you when I first moved back here.  It was like old times.  We had a lot of fun; it really didn’t feel like work.  (Ok, it felt like work a little bit when we had to trim Charlie’s hedges.)

Keven and Christina:  God has placed a huge dream in your hearts, don’t ever let anyone or anything snatch it away.  Don’t ever lose your passion; it ignites a fire in the hearts of all of those who are around you.  Always remember that our Mighty Captain is faithful to do all that He has promised.  I am so proud of you guys.

Tim and Alicia:  Some of my favorite memories in South Carolina involve all of us sitting around my kitchen table and talking together, weeping together, laughing together.  You guys are so special to us.  I have seen you guys grow so much in the last two years, and the best is yet to come for you.  God has called you out; be strong and courageous, for the Lord is with you wherever you go.

David and Melissa: Thank you for the life of faith that you live out on a daily basis.  God will surely honor such a faith.  You guys have been a constant source of encouragement to us.  I will miss our late night dinners, especially your desserts.  You have an open invitation to come and cook for us anytime in Idaho.

Noah and Emily:  I have no doubt that God brought you to South Carolina for us.  We are stronger, our faith is greater, and our God is bigger because of you.

Chad and Jenny: I have seen our King do incredible things in you and through you, and I look forward to watching your journey unfold as you walk this road of faith with Him. 

Ben and Tabatha:  What can I say?  I just love you guys.  I am honored to call you my friends.  Thanks for everything. Ben, there is no one that I can talk to like I talk to you.  Thank you.  It means more than you know. God is up to something, and it is really, really big.  Get ready, because it’s coming.

Josh and Ashley: Sometimes, words fail me.  This is one of those times.  I have come to love you like family. “Thank you” does not even begin to convey my gratitude for all you have done for my family.   I see God awakening things in both of you.  Lean into it, and allow Him to do His perfect work in you.  You are so special to Him and to us.

Dear God, I pray a special blessing over each of our friends.  Hold them under the shadow of Your wing.  Give each of them the courage to play out their role in Your story, and the revelation to know what that role is.  Thank you for putting each of them in our path on this journey.  Watch over them and protect them until we see them again.  Amen.

Too Heavy

 I did something a couple of days ago that I probably should have done as soon as we had finished loading our trailer two weeks ago.  I hooked that trailer, filled with all my worldly possessions, to my boss’s work truck, and I drove it down to the local landfill to weigh it on their scales.  Now the manufacturer’s recommendation for the Tahoe is that the tow weight not exceed 6900 lbs.  So when I weighed the packed out trailer, the total weight was 9300 lbs.  I only exceeded the weight limit by 2400 lbs.  Oops.

Needless to say, I did not really feel comfortable driving across the country with that heavy of a load. And I knew that if I was going to reach my destination, end up where God wanted me to be, I was going to have to leave some “stuff” behind.   So a couple friends and I spent the evening unloading the trailer, and Crystal and I went through almost every box and tub, trying to determine what we could leave behind.  And I learned that shedding 2400 lbs is not easy.  We spent a couple of hours making some tough decisions.  What must we take?  What can we leave behind?  What are the most important things we want with us on this journey?  What can easily be replaced after we arrive?

So the next morning, we reloaded my trailer, laying aside the weight that would hinder us. Of course, this whole episode got me to thinking about how many of us are weighed down by loads we are not meant to be carrying.  Loads that hinder us from accomplishing God’s perfect plan for us.

I am absolutely convinced that God has a very personal and specific purpose for each of us, a mission for us to accomplish for the kingdom.  But we cannot fully pursue God and His purpose if we are weighed down.

For some, the weights are internal things we carry deep inside ourselves.  Doubt, fear, guilt, shame.  These are powerful, fiery darts in the enemy’s arsenal.  He hurls them at us with all the hatred and vengeance he can muster.  He takes all of our hurts, failures, misunderstandings, mistakes, etc., and lays them before us again and again, as if to say, “This is who you really are!” And many become casualties of war by listening to his vicious lies. 

This is why we are to take up the shield of faith and the Sword of the Spirit, the Word of God.  God’s Word tells a much different story about who you are.  You see, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creature.  Old things are passed away all things are new. (2 Corinthians 5:17)  According to God, you are valuable, significant, holy, justified, righteous, powerful, and complete.  You are a prince/princess, a warrior, an ambassador, salt, light, and a citizen of heaven.  Christ has granted us forgiveness, healing, hope, freedom, purpose, and a future. (Just pull out a concordance and see what the Bible says about all of these things.)

 The enemy knows this and hates it.  He also knows your potential and fears it.  So he will spew his lies in order to steal kill and destroy all that God has for you.  My suggestion: let it go.  Drop the lies that you have believed for so long.  Realize what God says about you.  And swing that Sword at the devil, and he will have to flee.  By the way, do not be afraid to get some outside help with this if you need it. 

Other weights come from outside sources that we allow to control us.  More specifically, I am talking about all the things that compete for our time and energy: work, little league, play groups, church, ballet lessons, extended family, church, bowling league, unexpected phone calls, piano recitals, church.

I know way too many people that allow others to set their agenda, instead of seeking God and asking Him what they need to be doing.  I know I mentioned church three times in my list, and that was not an accident.  I have seen far too many Christ followers get burned out simply because they do not know how to say “no” to the Sunday school director, or the choir leader, or the nursery coordinator, or the youth pastor, or the chairman of the welcoming committee, or the Awana commander, or the head usher, or Sister Eunice’s bake club, or whatever other ministry has been created to be a “blessing” to others.  Let me say this as nicely as possible: Every ministry leader that approaches you about helping in their ministry has an agenda.  They have positions to fill, and you will help them get that job done.  And with very few exceptions, they are not concerned about your time, your abilities, your talents, or your God-given calling.  All they know is that you are breathing, and you can help them meet their quota.

I know this sounds harsh, but very few of them are actually looking out for you.  So guess what?  You have to look out for you.  Let me tell you how to keep from getting trapped into doing something that you do not want to do (whether at church or any other venue). 

First of all, seek God and find out what HE wants you to do. Again, I am convinced that God has a perfect plan for your life.  And He has created you with built-in talents, abilities, and desires to accomplish His mission. 

Secondly, if you are presented with an opportunity that does not line up with God’s purpose for you, simply say, “No, that is not what God is calling me to do at this time.”  Remember not every open door is from God, and just because something is “good” does not mean that it is God’s best for you.

Now if you are not sure about an opportunity, take some time to pray about it.  When God answers, act accordingly.

Finally, stand your ground.  Some of these ministry leaders  are very persistent.  They will come back, especially as their deadline approaches and they grow desperate.  Many will seek to “guilt” you into service.  Don’t cave.  Be strong and very courageous for the Lord is with you.

Now don’t get me wrong.  This is not an excuse for you to say no to everything; we are called to serve.  What I am saying is this:  Don’t get so busy meeting others’ agendas that you miss out on the mission that God has set before you.  Release any and every weight, whether internal or external, that will keep you from following your life’s purpose.

By the way, my trailer is totally reloaded, and I am still a little too heavy.  So I am headed out to release some more weight.  I do not want anything to keep me from reaching my destination.